Flat Earthers, The Band & The First Drink After the Beach.
(Written Summer 2018, Re-Edited 2022)
I like to read books about natural history. It’s sort of a hobby of mine. I don’t believe there’s anything more terrifying than being confronted with the vastness of the universe. The loneliness that ensues with the awareness that we are exceptionally insignificant is sort of a mental and mortal roundabout kick to the human ego. Though I do not ascribe to any religious ideology, I’m a philosophical masochist at heart just the same.
I recently started rereading Bill Bryson’s book “A Short History of Everything,” which if you have just one curious sinew in your soul, I would encourage you to read. Sadly, curiosity is a commodity these days, as there are more convenient myths than inconvenient truths. The 1980s has always been known as the decade of, “Living in Oblivion,” but with the rise of such groups as the “Flat Earthers,” I think the moniker is more synonymous with this day and age.
Whilst delving through Bryson’s genius tome I often wonder about the “Flat Earthers,” and think how decadent a time we must live in for people to believe in such nonsense. For example, even though Voyager 1, launched in 1977 is traveling through our solar system at 38,000 mph, billions of miles away from us, and you’re probably reading this on your cell phone, there are actually people who believe the world is flat. Science…” forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”
As Bryson points out, the average distance between stars is “20 million million miles away” (The million million, is not a typo). There are an estimated 100 to 400 billion stars in the Milky Way galaxy (who’s counting?) and don’t forget this little nugget, The Milky Way is just one of 140 billion or so galaxies, even larger than ours.” I’m sure Senator Clay Davis, of The Wire, would end all of this with a classic… “Sheeeeit.”
It’s been said by quantum physicists that time does not exist (at least the way we humans perceive it), and I’ve been told “that every distance is not near.” I have often felt the more knowledge I gain the lonelier I become. Maybe that’s why we have Flat Earthers? They just don’t want to be lonely. And though Science has gotten almost too good, an equation with a sum equaling divine salvation has yet to be written.
I get it. I honestly do. I’m actually there with them. As Voyager I, the Stars and the Universe expand out of our sight, so ultimately do the people and things we love dilate out of our world. All of “it” happens just a little bit at a time. So little at a time, you don’t realize it until the only light left is a soft golden halo of regret circulating life’s event horizon. “Spooky action at a distance,” indeed. Maybe there’s no such thing as death. Maybe all we are meant to perceive is order giving into entropy, giving way to unfathomable expansion, creating unimaginable possibilities. And then, back again…to do it all over again.
I took a little vacation last week over the 4th of July. It’s the longest I’ve been away from Swigg in quite a while. Rehoboth has always been my ancestral place of recess, and the sandy stretch of beach at the end of Virginia Avenue, has always been our family’s perch. Every morning we sleepily saunter from car to sandy nest, curtained by Maxfield Parrish painted clouds, and cocooned by a milky morning marine mist. Sitting under open sky, marooned on white sand, one gains a whole new appreciation for nuclear fusion.
Why is it, in the audience of the sun, and within the proximity of large bodies of water, time begins to slow within our mammalian brains?
I watched my children play in the water and I played with them. My wife and I smiled at each other quite a bit. I read some Hemingway, and took many half-asleep naps and dreamt of sailing, fishing and drinking. We played silly games, games of chance, games of skill and took home many shoddily made stuffed animals. This is what we did each day, and we lived what seemed like many days inside of one. We did this every day. We took deep breaths of salty umami air intermingled with even saltier aromas from restaurant fryers that festooned the boardwalk. We salivated over the drifting scent of caramelized sugar wafting from confections being made inside ancient seaside buildings and discarded melting cream and glucose on the planks of the splintering wooden avenue.
Every day we would return home, sun smothered and dazed from the Vitamin D. Feeling loopy and in love with life, I found happiness in the innocent introspective of my children and my wife’s omniscient smile. In my post sun-drunk content I poured a drink.
The first drink after a long day at the beach is an important one. It’s a moment to capture and accentuate the high Nature has already given. It’s a unique moment. A moment when the Universe channeled through ethanol, buoyed by the background radiation of the Big Bang, warmly lets you know, “everything can be replaced.” Everything Is going to be ok. If not in this dream, then the next. And in some instances, in the right light, you can see one’s existence, “come shining from the West down to the East.”
I brought a cache of Rosé down with us from a varying number of European locals. Nothing cerebral, just simple delightful stuff I can afford. I opened and poured a finely chilled example of such inside the unnatural stillness of my in-law’s house. Dorthy and I put on some deep cuts of Otis Redding as we prepped dinner. I began to pour big glasses of rosé for she and Joanne.
Later in the evening my son and I went out searching for amphibians of the night. We captured several toads and held them up to the slivered moon. We laughed at their beauty and design. “So cute” Griffin says. We scurried about searching for more specimens. I looked up into the light polluted sky and wondered where Voyager I was. I thought about the ocean tide we had played in all day and the Flat Earthers (Explain tidal forces). I thought about the distances between stars. I thought about Richard Manuel’s voice singing “I Shall be Released.” I thought about Bill Bryson (Man…the guy can Fucking write). I thought about entropy and time, and I thought about what to drink next. Griffin and I collected our catch and wandered home, and “I swear I saw our reflections somewhere so high above this wall.” Company had congregated before we had left. When we returned, we released our bumpy moist loves, and Griffin retired to a screen somewhere.I poured another glass of overly chilled rosé and rejoined the party.
“Any day now,
Any day now,
I shall be released.”
-David Govatos
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